Steve Lowry

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Posts by Steve Lowry

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  57

  I am new to the board

  by Pinned Blouse in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hello everyone, i am new to this discussion board.

  my name is pinned blouse because once i was wrongly df'd and i no longer attended the meetings, i noticed all my blouses had pin holes in them where i fastened safety pins in them to make sure i was always "modest" lol.

  mind you i do not have large boobies but i did not want to "tempt" the brothers.. .

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  Steve Lowry

  Unlike some of the guys here I would never stoop to making any references about your brests, pinned. But just exaclty how small are they?

  Welcome to the board!

  I am truly sorry for the loss of your brother there dear one.

  Steve
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  27

  Why Oh why !

  by blobby in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  now don't get me wrong....i'm on the way out (no not the closet !

  why do you ex jw's still keep coming onto this web site (ok i know its interesting etc) and dipping your toes in?

  i'd of thought you'd want to forget everything !.

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  Steve Lowry

  Well blobby,

  If and when you make it out of the organization, chances are you won't be questioning why there are so many former JW's who continue to post as much as they do on web sites such as this one. You'll just be damned glad that you have a place to go to for support. And chances are, you are going to need it. Maybe you will be the exception to the rule and have no problems upon your leaving. But most go through quite a few changes the day they step out of those Kingdom Hall doors for the last time. And that's what keeps me posting here. There's a great sense of satisfaction that former JW's experience in helping those who have made the difficult decision to leave the Watchtower Society. There are few bonds that create such strong ties between people, like that of former JW's.

  It's kinda funny, but you'll no doubt experience more love and understanding from a bunch of strangers here on this website (and others like it) than you ever did in person with the JW's you currently know.
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  27

  My friend and co-worker dead.

  by Steve Lowry in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  his name was robert thigpin and i worked with him for eight years (1990-1998).

  last night he killed himself.

  while we didn't always see things eye to eye, i could always count on him and he was a good co-worker.

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  Steve Lowry

  Thank you all for your concern and encouraging comments. Truly, this death has affected like none other. We were all called into the office today and given the news. I just saw Robert the other day and he seemed just fine. But he was not the kind of guy to wear his heart out on his sleeve, so to speak.

  A few years ago I planned and acted out on a suicide attemp (nothing JW related). I was in a deep depression and it consumed me. Just before I took the final step, I said to myself, "Maybe I will, but not today". I spent 48 hours under observation and went through a week of group therapy. I learned how to deal with depression and to recognize the signs. I think the thing that bothers me the most (besides the obvious pain that the family must now go through), is I know all to well from personal experience, the absolute torment Robert must have had to endure those last few hours. Its a living hell. Well, I hope he's in a better place now. He had gotten divorced a few years back, and now I worry that his boys will blame themselves for his decision. It will take years of work before they come to understand they had nothing to do with his deision to take his life.

  Thanks again for the compassionate comments. It helps.

  Steve
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  27

  My friend and co-worker dead.

  by Steve Lowry in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  his name was robert thigpin and i worked with him for eight years (1990-1998).

  last night he killed himself.

  while we didn't always see things eye to eye, i could always count on him and he was a good co-worker.

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  Steve Lowry

  His name was Robert Thigpin and I worked with him for eight years (1990-1998). Last night he killed himself. Don't know how. Don't know why.

  While we didn't always see things eye to eye, I could always count on him and he was a good co-worker. He leaves behind two little boys, ages fourteen and eleven.

  Robert, I don't know what your demons were buddy, but I hope you are at peace now, my friend.

  Steve . . .
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  23

  I am finally ready to deal with my father...

  by Aztec in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  he's pushed me to my last nerve!.

  i need any proof that i can verify that 1) the last days are not here!

  4) cult info.

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  Steve Lowry

  Aztec,

  This is so much easier of a task than you think! First, you're only wasting your time trying to convince your father of your view of the Watchtower Society. Secondly, and more to the point, what you really want to do is modify his behavior. Practically anyone's behavior can be modified. You simply tell him this, "Dad, I love ya, but I don't wanna talk about the Watchtower Society or anything to do with it. And I also don't want my kid being spoken to about it." (You put this is in your own words of course.) Now, if he respects your request first time outta the box, great! (He prolly won't). But if he persists, then everytime he mentions something JW to you or to your kid, simply remind him. Be firm, there's need to be rude. Most people with any sense of reality will respect a request like this. And the beauty of this approach is that you won't be arguing with your father about something he believes strongly about. It's all about setting boundries. Do it this way, and you'll have success. Do it by arguing with him and you'll only wind up alienating him and creating hard feelings. Trust me on this one. I've been through this learning curve with my own mother.

  Good Luck,

  Steve
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  46

  Yiou Got Two Minutes Left Of Your Life, What Would You Do?

  by Yizuman in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  saw an interesting thread, made me think....

  "what would you do if you found out you were going to die in 2 minutes?

  yiz

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  Steve Lowry

  I'd ask for another minute, of course!

  Actually, I'd give a quick look over my life, and spend the rest of the time making sure God was watchin' what was happening to me!
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  6

  Trying to introduce my Brother

  by Obviously Secret in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am seriously going to try to get my brother here after i talk to him a bit.

  he has stopped coming to the meetings for a while now and he is super opened minded, however, i still think he has a little faith in the truth still.

  i know it will be hard for him to realise that his life was a lie now come on.

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  Steve Lowry

  He'll be ok. Just let him discover the site for himself. You can't 'protect' folks from the big bad world out there. And if a questioning JW is gonna venture out of the confines of the Watchtower Society, then I think this is a pretty tame site for his first attempt. People around here are very encouraging, but if he spouts out JW rhetoric then he's gonna find out real fast about how folks feel about the Watchtower Society. And hey, that's the way it otta be.
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  18

  Calling my JW sister.....Help and Advice, Please!

  by lisaBObeesa in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it has been a long time since i spoke to my sister?a year or so maybe?

  i made a promise to myself to give her a call in the next week or so.

  i also promised my counselor, so i really have to do it!

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  Steve Lowry

  Yes, everyone wants their family to be happy and healthy. But in your case you have a cancer in your family unit called the Watchtower Society. It has destroyed more families than you can imagine. If it doesn't destroy completely, it almost always ruins portions of a family.

  I still maintain a somewhat 'cool' realtionship with my mother. But my sister cut me off some twenty years ago. I lost all contact with my two nephews and niece. Now, they're all grown up and I'll never get the chance to be that uncle to them that I could have been. A few years ago we had a little girl and suddenly my sister wanted to be sweet and loving, so SHE could have a relationship with MY kid. Well, screw that. I let her know I wasn't interested in any kind of a relationship with her and any idea she had about getting to know my kid was out of the question. I just won't allow any JW influence in my kid's life so she'd be out of the picture anyway. I only go to see my mom every couple of years (she's out of state) and I NEVER leave my kid unattended with my mom. I know she'd take any chance she could to talk JW to her (my kid). Not gonna happen.

  Don't deny your feelings. You're angry and you're pissed about the way your sis' is treating your mom. Why not let sis' know how you feel by shunning HER? Afterall, she seems to think this is a practice that is acceptable, right? Seriously though, you have to decide what's the most important thing that you want. Do you want a relationship with you sister? Sure you do. Do you want it at all costs? Are you willing to have a relationship with your sister while she refuses to have a relationship with your mom? I'll bet you don't want that. Let HER feel what it is like to be shunned for a while. I wouldn't call or wright her a letter or anything. Nada.

  Let me tell you a hard cold fact. There are going to be people in your life that you are going to realize that even though you may love them, they have an overall negative influence in your life. And there is nothing wrong with cutting them out of you life. It can be painful and difficult, but at least you know where you stand. There are those here that may disagree with this advice (maybe not very loving or something like that). Some want other's to make peace at all costs to 'save' or repair the family. It seems like the right thing to do. And maybe making peace or trying to keep the peace in your case is the best thing to do? Maybe not. Every situation is different, so you can't make a formula that every one can use. I only know what works for me.

  Good luck,

  Steve
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  11

  a couple more questions

  by North Girl in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  how long can you be a practicing witness before you are expected to be baptised?

  what changes once you are baptised?

  what do you have to do to become baptised?

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  Steve Lowry

  As long as you aren't a baptised JW, you aren't a JW, in THEIR eyes. Once you get baptised then they hold you accountable and in line. It's kinda like a legal thing to them. Sadly there's a lot of pressure to get baptised and little ones who have no idea of what they're getting themselves into jump in with both feet.

  Once you're a baptised JW, they hold it over as a threat to make you conform or suffer the shame and pain of being punished. Typical cultic practice and very effective.
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  40

  Where Would You Most Like To Visit?

  by Swan in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  with millions of people traveling this memorial day weekend i am curious.. where are you going this weekend?

  where would you go if time and money were not obstacles?.

  i am going camping in the forest near the oregon coast.

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  Steve Lowry

  I'm going to DC and put a six-pack on the tomb of the unknown bowler.